Why Teaching Kids the Right Words About their Bodies is Key to Safety and Empowerment

On my Clarify Kids podcast, which I record and film with my daughters, we often have some hilarious moments. One of my favorites happened when my eldest asked, “Why do men grow a mustache?” What cracked me up even more was how she pronounced it—“mush-tash.” It’s been a running joke in our house for years, and we all still laugh when she says it that way. There are other words, too, that my kids say in their own adorable, creative way. Oatmeal becomes “oak-noke,” the remote is a “marote,” and sometimes my youngest will say, “Noelle bees over there playing,” a phrase I still have no idea where it came from (but, reincarnation is possible, so maybe it’s my grandfather messing with me).

But here’s the point: as parents, we know that there are so many words our kids have to learn. And learning language is about so much more than just memorizing vocabulary. Some of these words are completely new to them—words they’ve never heard before or have never tried to pronounce. Others come with definitions, ideas, or concepts that are sometimes hard to wrap your head around. But once they get it, the world opens up with new meaning and understanding.

Now, when it comes to teaching kids about their bodies, we have to be very intentional about the words we use. It’s soimportant to teach our kids the correct anatomical terms for their bodies—words like penis, vagina, testicles, and breasts. These words empower children to talk about themselves and their bodies in a way that’s clear, confident, and free of shame. But here’s the thing: while scientific language is critical, I also believe it’s equally important to teach kids the slang terms and colloquial language that they will inevitably hear.

Why? Because it’s a matter of safety.

The Importance of Understanding Slang and Common Terms

If we only teach our kids the "correct" names for body parts and functions, we might leave them vulnerable to confusion or misunderstanding. Words like “sex,” “fuck,” “blow job,” or even “nice ass” can have very different meanings depending on who’s using them, and in what context. The truth is, kids will encounter these terms. They’ll hear them from their friends, see them online, or overhear them in movies or TV shows. If they don’t understand what these words mean, they could easily find themselves in situations where they feel uncomfortable, confused, or even unsafe.

For example, imagine a child who hears the word “sex” but has no idea what it means, or worse, thinks it means something innocent or unrelated. Or a child who is flashed by someone and doesn’t know the difference between “weiner” (slang for penis) and any other casual term. They might not recognize that what’s happening to them is inappropriate because they don’t have the right language to understand it.

This is why teaching kids slang terms alongside the anatomical terms is crucial. It’s about arming them with the knowledge they need to interpret the world around them correctly and respond appropriately. It’s about giving them the power to protect themselves and the freedom to speak up when something doesn’t feel right.

Empowering Kids with Knowledge

I know this can feel awkward. Talking to kids about sex, body parts, and all the slang words associated with them isn’t easy. But consider this: when you equip your child with the correct definitions, they have the ability to navigate difficult situations with confidence and clarity. For example, my daughter recently asked me what the word “bitch” meant. And, while I wasn’t thrilled about hearing it from her, I was glad that she came to me for an explanation. We were able to have a conversation about why that word is often used as an insult and how it’s a term that reflects disrespect.

Another example: my youngest came home from school and told me that two boys had “flashed” her their “weiners.” She knew immediately what was happening and that it wasn’t okay. Thanks to the fact that we’ve had open conversations about body parts and boundaries, she was able to recognize the inappropriate behavior and come to me with the right language to describe it. She didn’t feel embarrassed or confused. She knew how to respond.

By teaching kids the full range of language—both scientific and slang—you’re helping them build a toolkit of words that will protect them and empower them throughout their lives. It’s not just about knowing what a “penis” is or what “sex” means; it’s about giving them the language they need to understand their bodies, communicate clearly, and set boundaries.

Tackling the "Cringe Factor"

If you’re feeling a bit squeamish or awkward about having these conversations with your child, you’re not alone! Talking about puberty, sex, and body parts can be uncomfortable for many parents. But it doesn’t have to be cringy. In fact, it can be empowering—for both you and your child.

If you’re struggling to know where to start, I’ve created a series of Clarify lessons designed to help you navigate these tricky topics in a way that’s both comfortable and educational. The lessons are designed to give you the confidence to talk openly and honestly with your kids about sex, body parts, and boundaries—without the embarrassment or discomfort that often comes with these conversations.

We can all agree that these topics can feel awkward, but by creating a space for your child to learn, ask questions, and feel confident about their bodies, you’re doing something incredibly important. You’re giving them the knowledge they need to navigate their world safely, and you’re setting the stage for them to grow into well-informed, empowered adults.

Conclusion

Words matter. The language we use to describe our bodies, our feelings, and our experiences shapes how we interact with the world around us. For kids, knowing the correct names for their body parts and understanding the slang terms they will encounter gives them the tools they need to communicate effectively and protect themselves.

At my house, we’re still working on pronouncing words like “mustache” correctly, but we’re also doing the important work of teaching our kids the language they need to be safe, empowered, and informed. It’s not about making them feel awkward or uncomfortable; it’s about giving them the knowledge they need to navigate their bodies and relationships with confidence.

So, if you’re feeling unsure or overwhelmed about talking to your kids about puberty and sex, don’t worry. You’ve got this! Check out my Clarify Lesson Series, where I’ve made it easier than ever to have these important, life-changing conversations with your kids, in a way that feels natural and freeing—without the cringe.

Let’s take the taboo out of sex education and give our kids the gift of knowledge, confidence, and safety. They deserve it.